I am a Marriage and Family Therapist and I work with many different configurations of relationship, from individuals to couples and parent-child pairs to whole family groups. My guiding principle can be seen in the following poem written by William Stafford:
There’s a thread you follow. It goes among
things that change. But it doesn’t change.
People wonder about what you are pursuing.
You have to explain about the thread.
But it is hard for others to see.
While you hold it you can’t get lost.
Tragedies happen; people get hurt
or die; and you suffer and get old.
Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.
You don’t ever let go of the thread.
Each of us has a unique purpose for being here in this life. Entering into the process of revealing this thread can bring us into a new and more satisfying engagement in our every day life. Not because we find a concrete answer to the question, “What is my purpose,” but because entering into the ongoing process re-orients us to how we engage in our life. It does not necessarily resolve our problems or make our life easier, but we can remember that our life is bigger than any one experience – pleasant or unpleasant – and as Victor Frankl wrote, “life needs you.” So when we engage our life from this orientation, the inevitable suffering we encounter can be met with capacity to engage responsively rather than be caught up in reactivity.
This same principle applies to our relationships. Each relationship has a life span and purpose of its own. It could be an intimate partnership, a parent-child bond, siblings, colleagues or friends. Relationships will always uncover our rough edges, wounds and of course, will always provide us with opportunities to learn. This is an inevitable aspect of humans relating to each other. The goal of therapy is to increase capacity to manage your response to life’s inevitable difficulties with grace and skill.
How We Begin
My initial goal is to help you decide if I’m a good fit for you. Even a great therapist may not be the right therapist. Many factors influence whether it is a good match. It is important that you feel your therapist’s compassion, are confident in their integrity and comfortable enough to receive their reflections and feedback. During a free initial 30 minute consultation, we will discuss your goals for therapy and I will discuss my approach. My hope is that you’ll gain some clarity from our meeting which will help you determine how you wish to proceed.
Please have a look around this site and use the phone number or email below to contact me with any questions or to schedule your initial session.
Thalia Ryer, MA, LMFTA
Tel. (425) 202-5897